Monday, March 30, 2015

11 Ways The New TSA Bans Describe Grumpy Cat, Judge Judy, Ferris Bueller, & Myself As Terrorists...

I'll be traveling to Santa Fe in July for a week of family vacation, so tonight I decided to browse current flight deals, right? Well, I didn't find any fabulous deals, no shocker there. But, I did find all kinds of tweets mocking TSA's latest PR disaster formally titled, 'Signs You Might Be a Terrorist.' While the "points" are ridiculous to an extent they're nothing of surprise considering the source, responsible for posts like this:


Anywho, apparently I need to work on my involuntary bodily functions because my current whistling, yawning, and/or eye gazing styles could best be described as exaggerated... definitely awkward... but surely not awkward to the point of being terroristic. However, I find comfort in knowing the gems below (all of whom are examples demonstrating how NOT to be/live/exist/do/express on TSA turf, as per TSA) will keep me company in TSA's terrorist lounge so it's all good. 

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #1: EXAGGERATED YAWNING

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #2: EXAGGERATED GESTURES

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #3: EXAGGERATED THROAT CLEARING

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #4: EXAGGERATED IMPROPER ATTIRE 

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #5: EXAGGERATED HAND-RUBBING

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #6: EXAGGERATED GAZING

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #7: EXAGGERATED WHISTLING 

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #8: EXAGGERATED PALE FACE OR BEARD OR SOMETHING 

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #9: EXAGGERATED GROOMING GESTURES

SIGN OF A TERRORIST #10: EXAGGERATED SWEATING

And last but not least, an exaggerated collection of my favorite terrorist tick of all... 


SIGN OF A TERRORIST #11: EXAGGERATED OPEN, WIDE, AND/OR STARING EYES 






*gifs courtesy of giphy.com